it sucks to be independent. it sucks to hold it all up inside, alone. it sucks to feel that I'm always alone despite the number of people saying that I'm not. it sucks cause i don't know how to express this. it sucks to know that I'm really desperate. it sucks to face the reality that I'm living in. it sucks that the happiness is only temporary. it sucks to know that i'd still cry myself to sleep no matter how much i tried not to. it sucks to push away the people that i used to be close with. it sucks to be writing this and knowing the fact that people will still judge.