あ

it sucks to be independent. it sucks to hold it all up inside, alone. it sucks to feel that I'm always alone despite the number of people saying that I'm not. it sucks cause i don't know how to express this. it sucks to know that I'm really desperate. it sucks to face the reality that I'm living in. it sucks that the happiness is only temporary. it sucks to know that i'd still cry myself to sleep no matter how much i tried not to. it sucks to push away the people that i used to be close with. it sucks to be writing this and knowing the fact that people will still judge.

at time like this i really wish you were here with me, to comfort me, and to tell me that everything's gonna be alright. to tell me that this pain will go away, soon enough without me knowing. i wish you were here to tell me its okay to cry and i also want you to tell me to stop crying and hurting myself. i wish you could at least tell me how to make things better and to make everyone happy again. i wish you'd never leave cause that would change everything.

sadly, you left. leaving me in this cruel world, alone.